Sermon: "Sitting Before Serving"

Delivered August 27, 2006 by Rev. George Antonakos.

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In all my years of teaching and preaching and leading Bible study and small groups, no particular passage other than the one that I am about to share with you generates more discussion than the one that we are looking at today and when people look at this passage, it just seems like people want to take sides when they read this text. So I am going to pray and then we are going to look at this text. It can be found on page 735 in the pew Bible or you can follow it on the screen when we begin. So let's pray.

Lord, we give you thanks for your great love. We thank you for the promise that you shared with your disciples and with us, that the Holy Spirit would come and teach us the things that pertain to you. And so, we pray that as we look at your word and think about our life, that we would align it more with you by the power of your grace and we pray that you will open our ears so that we might hear. In Jesus' name. Amen.

Here's the text and it's a familiar and beautiful text:

"As Jesus and his disciples were on their way he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all of the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself. Tell her to help me." "Martha, Martha" the Lord answered, "You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better and it will not be taken away from her."

I remember gathering with a group of pastors when this particular passage came up in conversation and one retired minister who was there, he was in his mid 80s, recalled preaching a sermon on this text and he titled it "Martha got a bad rap." For those who are young here today, that means that she had a poor and unfair assessment of who she was over again something about music, okay? He went on to explain that while most see Martha receiving a gentile rebuke in this passage, his take on it was there are not enough Martha's in the church. There are not enough people who sacrificially serve. And so, before long in this conversation with this group of pastors it wasn't long before people started to take sides with Mary or Martha and the Martha people said, "Well remember the 80-20 rule, you know in any institution 20% of the people do 80% of the work." And then Mary crowd sounded this way, "The church is about relationships, not work per se; to place too much emphasis on the task makes us little more than religious bureaucrats."

I also recall times when people have gathered for a ministry meeting and invariably there are people who just want it to be business, which I call a Martha time and there are those who want more Mary time, they want more time to get to know each other and to pray and honestly the Mary folks drive the Martha folks kind of nuts, because they want to get it done. I know the Martha people don't say this, but I think this is sometimes what they think. "You know why do we have to do all this navel-gazing about our feelings and sharing and our history and our needs, why? I have lint in my navel; do you have any lint in your navel? Shouldn't we compare our lint?" You know? That's what I think they feel like. And then the Mary people on the other hand who don't feel like that at all, kind of pick up that attitude and they say, "You need to relax. You need to chill out and quit worrying about getting the work done all the time." "Someone has to do the work." "Let's remember why we are doing the work in the first place, okay?" Back and forth it goes.

But something tells me and my guess is today that most listening have probably experienced what it's like to be in the place of both of the sisters and they are very different places and very different feelings. Something tells me that when Luke wrote this and placed this in his gospel, he wasn't trying to generate the kind of debate that I just described. He was trying to encourage a balanced Christian life. It's of some interest that the parable of the Good Samaritan comes right before this text and the teaching on the Lord's Prayer comes right after this text. Sacrificial loving service to those in need on the front end, dependence on God and prayer very clearly on the back end and right between is this story of Mary and Martha. It's almost like it's another reminder of the verse for the year, "Love God, with all your heart, mind, soul and strength." Sit at Jesus' feet. Have an intimate relationship with God and then you will be able to best serve neighbors in need. And that service won't be out of a sense of obligation, it will be out of a sense of love.

Two weeks ago about 30 of us from Central Church attended Willow Creeks 11th annual leadership summit. There were very powerful presentations from world leaders, church leaders, business leaders and I don't think it was planned per se, but it seemed as though there was a thread running through the messages of that conference that was speaking about serving out of a spirit of rest. And one in particular struck me, Andy Stanley, who is the pastor of an 11,000 member church in the suburbs of Atlanta and it happens to be Charles Stanley's son as well, shared a time when he was on the edges of burn-out in his ministry. He was trying to start up a church. He was so busy. He was going in so many directions and he was getting so frustrated and he said that he used to pray this way when he was in that whole busy mode. He would say, "Now Lord when I am over here doing this for the church and trying to talk to these people and trying to build your kingdom, would you please be over here with my family who I feel like I am neglecting and just kind of take care of their needs and be with them, help them?" And then when he was converted, when he finally prayed to the Lord he said, "You know this is crazy. I will never last."

And so he sat down and he wouldn't recommend it, but he said that he made a deal with the Lord, he said "Lord if you would use me for 45 hours a week to build your church, I will be satisfied with that." And he said he had a lot of guilt about that and he disappointed some people in the congregation that he shared with as well. But after that and after he adjusted to that, he started to pray differently. It was a complete turnaround. Now when he couldn't be at the church because he was making his commitment to stay within a certain timeframe, he would pray, "Now Lord when I am over here ministering with my family and helping my family, would you please be with the people over at the church and help them with whatever they need and the things that I just can't attend to." He said it was a total world of difference and amazing things happened and he went on to report that, I don't know, the 100 and something staff that worked at that church they loved to work there because of that balance.

Now I know that there may be some thinking at this point 45 hours a week, man that is three days in my work world and that sounds pretty slack to me. And you know what, I can identify with that. Many of us have been conditioned to work more than that and feel guilty if we don't and that whole Protestant work ethic and all, but you know there is some imbalanced when it gets... well I can tell you times that I have been in that place where I just feel so totally wrung out and can't do another thing. That is not where God wants us to be. I remember going to seminary and I served ten years in vocational youth ministry and after ten years in ministry I was running dry and this church so graciously allowed me to go to seminary, but one of my greatest fears, I might have shared this with you before, was that when I finished with seminary that I would get a call to a church and within six months I would be feeling the way I was feeling when I left here to go to seminary. I thought how will I ever live with that. How will I ever deal with that? I can't do it.

I have read other stories and I have shared this with the new members class a couple of weeks ago about a Lilly Foundation under the direction of Charles Olsen. He was trying to bring more balance to church boards to balance worship and prayer and in work and he found in one Lutheran congregation and he wasn't picking on Lutherans, there is just a position in Lutheran congregations called lay leader; it's like the top lay person in the church who somehow in their governmental system compliments the work of the pastor and the rest of the church board and it's a very important position. And in one church he said he found that these folks, these lay leaders who served for a period of three years, that three successive lay leaders not only ended their term and resigned, that each one over a nine year span, each person left the church that they were serving. In other words, they were so burnt out that they not only stepped down from that position, they said, "I am out of here." Now there is something wrong when life gets like that. And I think that is what we need to think about in this text.

You see, Martha was a good woman. She was a hard worker. She was a believer who really welcomed Jesus in to her home and she wanted to provide a splendid meal for the master. It was her gift. It was her gift of hospitality that was at work. But let me tell you something about Martha and about people that can identify with Martha, and people that may be think a 45-hour workweek is too short. You can have a slight control issue, okay? You just... Martha was the first born of three. Anybody here first-born? I am a first-born. I am a first-born of three. Now, you don't have to raise your hand again, but let me say that generally speaking first-borns tend to be a bit bossy and have an irritating tendency to take charge of everybody that is around them, okay? And that's the way that Martha was and I see people elbowing each other and they are saying, "I told you. I told you that's you. You've got to cut it out." Then when you add the enormous social pressure to serve somebody and be hospitable, actually it was a cultural requirement to be hospitable when you combine Martha's energy and drive with that cultural expectation, she had tremendous leverage, a tremendous platform to stand on. And I think things got out of control for her. I mean they took on a life of their own. I think Martha was sitting there and there were lots of time when she was so tuned in to the expectations of others and her own expectations that she got herself in to a fix. She wanted things to be socially correct.

Remember when Jesus told the people at Lazarus' tomb, he was about ready to raise Lazarus from the dead and he told the people at the tomb, "Move the stone." You may recall Martha's comment at that time, and it was kind of like Martha Stewart actually. Here is a paraphrase. "Lord, you know after four days the decomposition of bodies is not a pretty thing. It won't smell nice." That is essentially what she said. Jesus said, "Thank you for the tip Martha, but our priorities are quite different." Now in a much less intense way in this story today, it's still about an issue of priorities. What Jesus actually said back in John 11 was, "Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God, if you would focus on what God's power can do, you will be amazed at what can happen." I am sure that she sat in that kitchen or stood in that kitchen and looked out at the living area and saw Mary sitting at Jesus' feet and probably said, "Sure, I would like to be sitting there. I would love to be sitting there listening to Jesus, having nothing to do just like my sister. I told her there would be a lot to do when Jesus and his disciples came and you know what really frosts me--Jesus is letting her get away with it." That is probably what was going through her head.

Look at Verse 40. Verse 40 if you just think about it for a minute is one of the most amazing verses to me, because this is where Martha reaches her boiling point. Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made because that is why she couldn't sit there. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me." Now can I suggest that when--and here is how you know when you are out of balance and when your priorities are jumbled up. You start telling Jesus what to do, okay? That is not good. You are out of whack when you start telling Jesus what to do, okay? And that's very clear that she had gotten out of that balance. It says it right in the text. The verbs make it clear. She was distracted, this literally means to be pulled like a horse with a bridle or someone who had like a nose ring, a bull with a nose ring, to be pulled and tugged in whatever direction the person pulling and tugging it wanted to happen. And later Jesus told her, "You are worried and you are upset about too many things." In other words, you are unduly concerned he is saying and pressured by your devotion to the goal of being a good hostess. It's a good goal, but you are overly concerned and upset about it and your preparations Martha have become too burdensome for you and that has prevented you from listening to God's word in your ear. You see that is the issue. Sitting at the feet of Jesus is about listening for God's word in our ears, not so we will do something with it necessarily like preach or teach, that's all good, but its for us. We need to hear it for us so that we will regain strength.

One ancient commentator suggested that this text means that, and this is a little bit of a stretch, but I thought it was funny, that what this meant was that she was making too many dishes. She had too many types of side dishes for the meal and that Jesus was saying, "Martha only the main course is necessary, okay? You don't have to worry about all this other stuff." Now, I don't think that is what it means and I don't think most scholars agree with that's what it means, but it's not a bad image. If your smorgasbord of activities and service starts controlling you more than you're controlling it, you are going to be hurting before too long. One reason I think it can't mean that is because Jesus was talking about a spiritual thing and not a physical thing. If he was saying you just need to put the main dish out and not all the other side dishes, all that this text would be for Martha was just a rebuke, but because it was a spiritual thing that this means, this one needful thing that Mary had, he was inviting Martha to come and sit next to Mary. Just come and join him. See, all of this stuff is preventing you from coming and being right where Mary is and I am not going to rebuke her, because she is choosing the one needful thing in all of life, a zeal to listen to God's word so as to create an intimacy with God out of which one abides and serves the world.

Do you know another way of knowing some signs, some symptoms of when we are getting in to that negative place is that we start to feel resentment. I think it is fair to say she probably felt resentful. She felt overburdened. When we are feeling overburdened that is another time. When we are feeling guilty about using the word no, either to ourselves or to others; when we develop a critical spirit; when we start serving the Lord or we continue serving the Lord and all of sudden we hear ourselves saying, "Where is everybody else?" These are all symptoms of getting in to a place where we need to sit at Jesus' feet and just listen. I mean I think of Mother Teresa as the epitome of somebody who sacrificially served and for the life of me I cannot imagine Mother Teresa saying, "Where are all of the other people that should be over here picking up bodies in Calcutta? I am calling the Pope." I just cannot imagine that because she had a balance in her life. She said, "Look there is 24 hours in a day, 8 hours you sleep, 8 hours you recreate, you sit at the Lord's feet, you do tend to your needs and 8 hours you serve" and that is the way she ran the Sister's of Charity; in a balanced way.

Look at this chart with me for a minute, because this describes what I mean by balance or working within flow. If you look at the vertical axis you see the word "demands" and the horizontal axis says the word "resources". You can see that the low point is where the axis join and as it extends out, it gets high. And here is what happens when you have high demands and low resources. You feel very anxious; you feel stretched beyond your capacity. On the other hand, when you have high resources, but you have low demands you can experience boredom and you know you are all over the place looking for something to do and you get in trouble, okay?

Everybody has a balance between demands and resources, which is called ones' flow. Everybody is different. Some people have more resources and more capabilities and they have more demands and some people have less, but it doesn't matter. The goal is working within your flow and that's when you are energized. That is when you are not on the edges like Martha was. And what I would like to add to this is this; under the word resources that is not going to be up there, but this is what I am thinking; that we forget that our greatest resource and our greatest capacity happens when we sit at Jesus' feet and zealously desire to hear his word to us and those who wait on the Lord gain what? New strength. They mount up with wings like eagles; they walk and are not tired, they run and don't faint.

A man was watching his son trying to move a small boulder in the yard because the son wanted to build something in that location and so he was grunting and he was straining with all of his might and his father comes to him and he says, "Son, are you using all of your strength?" "Yeah, dad I am using all of my strength." More straining and no success. "Son, are you using all of your resources?" "Dad, doesn't it look like I am using all of my resources?" More time goes by and still no success. "Are you sure you are using all of your resources son?" "Dad, look at me. What resources am I not using?" "Well son, you haven't asked me to help you yet." That's an illustration of where we get most of the time. We are straining, we are struggling, we are stretched beyond our limits, we think we have used everything up and we fail to realize again that our greatest resource is found in a deep and abiding relationship with the son of God, out of which we find renewed strength for our labors. We cannot keep at our labors without his grace and strength. The question, "Lord, what would you have me to do" is far better than the statement, "Lord, this is what I want you to do". If you ask that question, "Lord, what would you have me do in this mess that I am in and this anxiety that I am in", his first answer would be, "Come to me, all ye who labor and are heavily burdened and I will give you rest. Take my yolk upon you and learn for me for I am gentle and lowly in heart and you will find rest for your souls." What did he say? Learn from me and you will find rest for your souls.

In all of this Martha never stopped and said, "Jesus, what do you want? How would you like me to prepare this meal?" If she had asked that what would have had to change in her? Think with me for a minute. She would have had to let go of some internal demands. She would have had to let go perhaps of some perceived external demands and she would have had to say, "Lord in spite of all that I am trying to do, help me to shift my priorities so that they align with your priority for my life." It might have been a simpler meal. Call for carryout, right? Do something different if it prevents you, what you are doing before you do something different prevents you from getting time at Jesus' feet. So where do you need to simplify in order to really truly find space for God and please note it was not a bad thing that kept Martha from doing it. It was really a good thing. It was really a good thing and so the question becomes what positive good in themselves type of things need to be set aside in order to make the necessary time for that one needful good thing of relationship with Jesus? I mean you can think of a million things; job, children's needs, material things, church activity, education, TV, sports; all good stuff, but it they prevent us then before long we are going to get burnt and we might throw in the towel. But when we sit at his feet we find grace and strength.

How do you answer the question, do you want to know God better? If you say yes, then what needs to be re-prioritized in order for that to happen? What good things are distracting, worrying, upsetting you? Will you fight the enemy called the good thing in order to find the gift called the best thing? Genesis 29:20 is the way that I would like to end today. You probably don't have that committed to memory, but when you see it you will remember and probably the story that surrounds it. Very briefly, Jacob who is a conniver himself went and worked for his Uncle Laban, his Uncle Laban gave Jacob some of his own medicine and tricked him in to marrying his oldest daughter Leah while he was thinking that he was going to be marrying Rachel and so he worked out a deal. His uncle worked out a deal with him; well will work seven more years and then you can marry Rachel as well. So here's the verse: "So Jacob served seven years to get Rachel, but they seemed like only a few days to him because of his love for her." That's a great verse. Service even when you haven't been treated right is a delight when the object of your serving is clear.

And it's a good thing that Jacob felt this way because could you imagine what Rachel would have had to have go through after this seven years if it wasn't this way? Could you imagine what she would have had to put up with? I worked for seven years for you and you don't appreciate all that I... I mean that would have been a nightmare. Jacob served with a sense of delight versus a sense of duty and time flew rather than stood still. In spite of his own conniving, I can't think few people who would have more license for resentment than Jacob, but he didn't have it, because the object of his serving was clear.

And so Jesus comes to us today, he is always coming to us. He is coming to you right now and he is asking you the question that he asked his own disciples, "Do you love me? Tend my sheep." "You know that I love you, Lord." "Do you love me?" "You know that I love you." "Do you love me? Tend my lambs." Remember he didn't come at them with a question, "Do you love sheep? Do you love lamb?" He said, "Do you love me. If you love me and you sit next to me and if you will learn from me, you will have the power and the capacity to serve to your own delight beyond what you could ever imagine." To answer yes to the question, I love you, is to discover that one needful thing, that better part that will never be taken away and will make service to Jesus not a drudgery, but a delight. Keep that in mind as we launch into a year of service. We are going to be hearing a lot of things in the coming months and weeks about AIDS and serving and all of that. This is a little preamble to keep our priorities aligned with his. Let's pray.

Lord, we thank you for your grace and love to us and again for being so kind and gentle to us. Thank you for saying Martha, Martha, for just tenderly calling her out of her distractions to once again find the place of strength. Help us to remember that the fruit that is born of value comes from roots that are hidden and secret. Help us to be in that secret place, not for our own selves alone, but so that others might experience your love through us as well. We ask it in Christ's name. Amen.

© 2006, Rev. George Antonakos
Central Presbyterian Church, Baltimore, MD 21204 410/823-6145
www.centralpc.org